Today morning when I woke up I felt something weighing my lips down. I sat up straight, stretched my hand to feel it when mom came rushing into the room to check on my supposed “swine flu” condition. I had been suffering from some cold past two days. She began screaming.
“I told u to take her to the doctor yesterday. Look what has happened to my girl!!!”
Dad came rushing into the room half expecting a life and death situation. I was half asleep-half awake, my usual condition for ten minutes every morning. I never speak anything for these ten minutes. But today I heard myself say “Mom!!! I don’t have swine flu!!!”
Pushing aside my cover I ran to the nearby mirror. I stared. The person staring back from the mirror looked like Donald ducks twin. My upper lip had swollen five times the original size. The ten minutes had not yet lapsed. I was still drowsy. My feet gave way slightly.
Dad caught me as he always did in such situations. Mom dramatized the moment, “She’s fainting..!!!“
Half asleep, I still managed to say, “Its not the flu.”
I marvel dad. His ability to stay calm around such dramatic personalities never fails to amuse me. He put me back to sleep and called up a nearby doctor for an appointment.
Not wanting the watchman to look at me in such a funny condition, I wore a mask, the ones they wear for swine flu these days. Not that I minded him seeing me in this condition. I dint want him to have a hearty laugh. I hate him. He always sleeps on duty.
With the mask on, I left with dad. I really felt like a flu patient then.
The doctor lacked a sense of humor. He dint smirk even a bit on seeing me. Dad grinned sometimes on seeing me in this state, so I knew his sense of humor was intact. The doc prescribed some medicine and balm. I bought them and started for home. On my way back I met a dozen suspicious neighbors who in the past week doubted that I had the flu. Seeing me on with the mask et al., they all presumed I really was suffering from the flu finally. I dint try to change their mind. At least the flu was a more decent disease than Donald duck lips.
As I am writing this, my Donald duck lips are still very much intact. Mom is continuously coming up with new theories each minute, trying to figure out what really happened to me. Dad is in office, happy to be in a sane atmosphere finally. Sis, thankfully, is still unaware. I’m sure she will spend the first fifteen minutes laughing when she sees me, click pictures, ask me all the details and then repeat it to a dozen friends and laugh for the next thirty days.
I, for one, am cursing the insect that did this to me last night. Wretched creature!!!!!
The doc said the swelling would remain for at least the next two days.
Now I wear the mask at all times. The maid also feels I have the flu. She never stays in the same room as me.
I have a hearty laugh whenever I pass the mirror. I pity all those who cannot see me. In the end, I pray that my lips reduce to the exact size of Angelina Jolie’s. This story then, will finally have a happy ending.
Kakoli still suffering
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